[libc++] graph_header_deps.py: Update the computing of "root" (public) headers.

The "root nodes" of the graph are displayed in bold. My intent here
was to bold just the public-API headers, e.g. <vector> and
<experimental/coroutine> and <stdlib.h>, but not helper headers
such as <__functional_base> and <__iterator/next.h>. However,
the recent mass helper-header-ification has exposed defects in
this logic: all the new helpers were ending up bolded! Fix this.
Also, add <__undef_macros> to the list of headers we don't display
by default (like <__config>); it's not interesting to see those edges.

Also, add a sample `dot` command line to the `--help` text.